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Why now? Why here? Why not!

The most common question asked of me (and most foreigners to Taiwan) is “Why did you come here?”  Indeed, this is the question many people ask whenever one decides to leave a familiar place to explore something foreign.  My answers have varied from ” I followed a boy here,” to “I wanted a change,” to “I wanted to make some money to pay off loans” to “I don’t know.”  The 3rd is the most authentic, and the most accurate while the others have all just been rationalizations, excuses, qualifiers.  Rationals are so very important aren’t they?  We need them more than sex, more than food.  We can live a day without food or sex, but we probably couldn’t do a day without a rationale.  I’m pretty sure I read that in a book, the title of which I have forgotten.

And so I just love the arts for allowing and requiring me to shut down the left brain buzz of analysis and rationalizations.

These words of G.B. Shaw are validating for me when I feel the unnecessary pressures of finding a good enough reason to begin or to end an exploration.

This is the true joy in life, the being used for a
purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; the
being thoroughly worn out before you are thrown on the
scrap heap; the being a force of nature instead of a
feverish selfish little clod of ailments and
grievances complaining that the world will not devote
itself to making you happy.
George Bernard Shaw

When I decided to go to Spain to walk the Camino de Santiago, it was something similar.  I simply felt joyful to embark on a unique and challenging adventure.  The purpose to live playfully, curious about the world and its people, helps me to learn about myself and grow.  The accomplishments I most highly regard of my experiences so far, have not been those that promised prestige, stability or wealth (on the contrary, they’ve been at the expense of these somtimes); they have been experiences that I opened myself to because I felt drawn to them. 

I’ve always felt that my privilege of being a Filipino-Canadian immigrant meant that I must live my life to the fullest joy possible, or my parents’ sacrifice and dedication to my upbringing and the lives of people who died in the name of “freedom” would have been in vein.  They fought for the the options I now have, and although sometimes the scope of them can be paralyzing when making decisions, they are leading me down some incredibly fascinating pathways.

We are living on borrowed time and borrowed soil, with boundless opportunities to create and experience Joy and Love.  I can’t think of a reason why I shouldn’t have come.

As my friend Yuta put it, “The world rotates at more than 14,000 miles per hour.  We should do our best to keep up.”

It is the search that brought me into this world, it is what keeps me here, and it is what will lead me home to Creator.

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